Love Poem: Jasmine
Crying is Passionate Loving
Tonight I comfort myself,
I write these words for me.
Face sunken between my knees,
I hang there,
Sensing the ache travel through my body.
I want to document this pain.
I smack the back of my head over and over again,
Maybe this time it'll teach me.
Tear drops leave wrinkled spots on paper,
And my crying - just sniffs, no sounds at first.
Then I cry, like a roar,
Let the whole neighborhood hear,
How I cry with passion,
With love and surrender.
I wrap my arms around me,
These quivering breaths start to calm.
Let's document this pain, shall we?
This paper is ready to be crumbled,
Ironed out much later in time by me.
I try to straighten it out,
I can't.
And it's lovely I guess - creased and shriveled,
But wiser now.
The texture of this paper and my skin,
Never again smooth,
Never again touched carefully,
Like a fresh, white blank paper.
Hello Jasmin!
ReplyDeletePresented yet anoter angle, and well put!
The idea of putting down what's been felt was wonderful!
Jesus Loves You!
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DeleteThank you so much Shubham!
DeleteIt's well written, Jasmine. What stayed with me is the parallel relation drawn with the paper on which she is writing her pain. It's plain texture with the freshness, crumbled with the wiseness. The use of body language through arms wrapping, smacking head on the wall, the ache travelling, sunken face between the knees is also something I noticed.
ReplyDeleteWonderful!
DeleteThank you so much Pallavi! I realized that I thoroughly enjoy noticing and describing the body - seeing how it structurally changes with different emotions and in different situations.
DeleteHey! Jasmine.It is a beautifully crafted poem. You have very well let your emotions (emotion of your poetic persona) flow with the rhythm of lyrics. The way you have build an entire castle of "pain" by laying its foundation in every stanza; with the solitude of understanding "self" and "love" is impeccable.
ReplyDeleteThank you so much Preeti!
DeleteHi Jasmine!
ReplyDeleteI really like how your poem begins with a declaration of self love, it's a very powerful proclamation. The metaphor of tears as blank pages only to be wiped off/ironed straight waiting for the next outpour is quite a beautiful idea.
Thanks for sharing!
Thank you so much Kanika!
DeleteTitle suits with the lines in the poem.
ReplyDeleteThank you!
Delete"And it's lovely I guess - creased and shriveled,
ReplyDeleteBut wiser now"
Brilliant. Firstly, I truly appreciate an effort at addressing self-love without romanticizing it. Secondly, the absolutely fitting analogy of the texture of paper to denote the marks, scars or the souvenirs of love. Kudos.
Thank you Prabahan!
DeleteHeart-Wrenching! Very deep..
ReplyDeleteThank you Megha :)
Delete