City poem - Bhargavi
The Blinding Voice of a City
Here's a city I bring to you
A city calling for night lights
Dimming in the day and alive at
The moment the clock strikes pm 5.
Hollowed by the noises
Crumbling the twilight
Into something remarkably silent
Yet, furious in its highlight.
You, do you hear that too?
Can you make out what it says?
Here's a city speaking
Of how you're meant to lose
Yourself in it, to find yourself.
It all seems so big
And I, puny and small
Do my thoughts also wander
Like the people climbing walls?
What's the race here?
How do I win?
How do I win?
What's the race here?
Repetition on repetition I hear
'T's twisted in a downward spiral
No matter how intense the calling,
It ceases to bring me to wonder.
Wonder why am I here?
How is this comforting?
Where the city makes us look small
But nature calls for nurturing.
"I see efforts galore and understand
How you might not
Take my authority or
Be able to withstand.
That which comes along .
I speak of you to my conscience
We don't have place
For those who question
Or not comply
What we offer into transition.
Take us in spirit and abide
We have much to offer
But you have to break
Nature, nurture and pride.
Leave behind awareness
Leave behind joy
For we bring to you a space
Where you strive,
Strive and die."
You heard that didn't you?
What is it to take home
That which they give
That which we take
For we can't find our virtue
In such a blind space.
The poem is definitely well written but the middle part in the poem couldn't make me understand of what exactly is the voice talk about? Also in the first stanza, i think it would sound more poetic and rhythmic like " dimming in the day and alive at night/ the moment the clock strikes 5". Just a suggestion. You'll know what suits the best. I get a glimpse of busy ness that mostly is seen from the evening. Good one!
ReplyDeletehi Bhargavi,
ReplyDeleteThis poem gives me some images of questions that i wanted to ask myself. and as you said
What's the race here?
How do I win?
How do I win?
What's the race here?
Wonder why am I here?
How is this comforting?
sometimes i was stuck with that questions . i find that most of the time you want to search your answer which you have already know ?....but i want to know your mean towards these above couplet which i mentioned in my comment? if you wish you can tell me..
Baki it's really same as i think...
Hello Bhargavi!
ReplyDeleteThis very touchy! Indeed the predicament of the people living in metro cities, sensitively approached and put, and well crafted! The contrast between a sensitive individual's speculative monologue on one hand and the earsplitting hustling and bustling of the city, especially accented through a quote, was simply amazing!
आप को पढ़ कर इफ़्तिख़ार ईमान सिद्दिक़ी की ग़ज़ल के चंद अशअआर याद आ गए--
वो न होगा तो क्या कमी होगी
बस अधूरी सी ज़िंदगी होगी
ग़म ही चांदी है ग़म ही सोना है
ग़म न होगा तो क्या ख़ुशी होगी
उस को सोचूं उसी को चाहूं मैं
मुझ से ऐसी न बंदगी होगी
बात होठों पे जम गई उन के
चुप ये टूटे तो अनकही होगी
डूब जाएगी शोर में दुनिया
लफ़्ज़ होंगे न ख़ामोशी होगी
Ideed a beautiful piece Bhargavi!
Cheers!
Jesus Loves You!