Other Poems (2) - Prince Tomar

Did I tell you that?


It rained today
Did I tell you that?

It reminded me of you, of
The pictures you sent me — of the weather there
Of the dancing trees,
Did I tell you that?

I have a feeling you already know that
Were you also thinking of me?
Did the dancing trees there
Remind you of the pictures I sent you?

The sky here is
Clear now.

It's clear no more.
You've become a gloomy distraction
Which I need to get rid of.

The earth is all soaked in the rain;
It'll get dry soon,
When I wake up tomorrow
I don't want those prints of raindrops on the cars
I want nothing which can remind me of you.

I want it all gone.
Did I tell you that?

Comments

  1. Pallavi VermaApril 28, 2019 at 1:44 PM

    Hi Prince!
    I really find it interesting the way the tone and mood of "Did I tell you that?" changes by the end of it. It has some really subtle imageries like prints of raindrops of car which also associate to the leftover memories of something that was once fresh like those pictures sent to one another. Just a suggestion third stanza first line, perhaps you can remove "that" after 'I have a feeling', I think it's not required.

    ReplyDelete
    Replies
    1. Prince TomarMay 11, 2019 at 3:15 AM

      Thank you so much, Pallavi for your insight. It's really helpful.

      Delete

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